Another of our local sides, Sutton, boasted a bumper crowd 200 up on the average, Fisher Athletic’s crowd was up 60%, Wealdstone’s up 25% and zeitgeist club Lewes netted their 2nd highest turn out in the last year. A few clubs reported dwindling crowds or no change but, hey, not everyone can win!

As ever, Twitter hummed with excitement about Non League Day, it started trending in a number of locales around England. Just stick ‘nonleagueday’ into the search and read all hundreds if not thousands of tweets all bigging up the day, giving goal action, quirks and photos from the games and, afterwards, links to match reports.

Some choice favourites of mine express why Non League Day was and should always have been a success. @monfter got to the crux of it, “Enjoyed my #nonleagueday at Maine Road v Ramsbottom. £10 for entry, prog, pie & drink. I’ll be back for game v New Mills. @non_league_day” @DolphinHotel captured the very real comments of players leaving the field “@non_league_day Birtley Town player at #nonleagueday: “It’s the first time in Birtley’s history we’ve had any fans.”"

Benevolent Scotland fans, waiting for connecting flights back home after returning to Gatwick from Lithuania, got into the spirit and popped over the road from the airport to catch Crawley .v. Fleetwood. On a similar tack, @LesRosbifs “Got sick of traffic on North Circular and M25, so peeled off and caught Egham Town 3 Epsom & Ewell 1. Enjoyable for me & kids. #nonleagueday”. Opportunist.

Then there were the jealous few who too late realised they’d missed out on something, @hyllandinho said “Wish I’d got involved in @non_league_day #nonleagueday; bike ride was good but I like these initiatives! Will look for some Sunday fixtures”

The attitude to Non League Day by all and sundry cannot be underestimated, so much positive energy coming from those thoroughly behind the initiative and from those who were turned on to lower league football. From the off, the excellent BBC @nonleagueshow got right behind it. Football legends 200% gave us all the low down and, on the day, @itvfootball‘s @jamesappell made sure they RT’d scores and kept people in the loop. John Terry apparently showed up at Eastbourne and Jonathan Pearce turned up at Lewes, well, who hasn’t turned up at the Dripping Pan recently? Except us.

Of course, Non League Day wouldn’t be a non league day without one condescending supporter of a big club. With apparent lack of irony and self awareness, @ManUtd24 shows the world exactly what sort of fans the big clubs have* “Inform me of the FC United score today, guys. Trying to look like I care…#nonleagueday” Charming and nothing less than we’d expect.

A big thanks to James Doe @non_league_day for giving the country his idea and to everyone for getting behind it. When’s the next one? And thanks to the Tweeters mentioned above for making sure I could look back in anguish.

*A sweeping and unjustified conclusion based on one Tweet. Well, it served a purpose. Apols to @ManUtd24 if his/her sarcasm has been missed.

Sutton United 0 Staines 1

Essentially, this game can be summed up in one word. Dull. More appropriately it can be encapsulated in a sentence. Staines scored in the first minute, there was a scuffle just before half time that resulted in red, the woodwork was struck and Sutton could perhaps have equalised. That’s yer lot.

Bye then. But, there’s something we meant to do a while ago and this affords us the perfect chance to do so. A Tale Of Two Uniteds by Jeff Perkins was handed to us in a brown paper bag (well, white plastic) by an undercover Sutton operative in exchange for good copy (not really, I still owe him a pint).

The book is a piece of history, your dad will remember it. It’s the story not only of the biggest game of Leeds United’s history against mighty Sutton in the 4th round of the FA Cup in 1970 but it is so, so much more. OK, like us, Jeff is quite probably not the most stylish or verbose writer you’ll ever read and, let’s face it, the story here is very niche. However, this is one of the most genuine books you’ll ever read. It is, on the whole a thoroughly engaging and heartfelt book. At times it dwells too much on minutae to be totally fluid but it is also a cracking document of not only a moment in time but the people involved in it.

The book, classically, sets the scene, leads up to the main event and introduces you to the characters through historical document and modern day interview. It uncovers the emotions experienced by the underdog protagonists and discovers what they went on to do afterwards. It draws you in to the world of the footballer, the non-league footballer and the fan.

Whether deliberately or by happenstance, what this book does beautifully is illustrate the VAST gulf between players of yore and today. It also hints at why these people played football for enjoyment, rather than pursuing fame or money. In short, it’s what non-league football was, and in some ways still is, about, in comparison to probably the best team in England at the time.

I was familiar with no more than a couple of the Sutton men, for they were men, involved but what came across was what you and I think when we play football. It’s fun, it’s a game.

As far we’re aware this book can only be obtained via the Sutton United website here – but, if anyone knows otherwise, please let us know.

A Tale Of Two Uniteds by Jeff Perkins £6.95

Assuming there are going to be two teams relegated, which might change depending on FA tinkering elsewhere in the pyramid, there is one place left to be filled and three teams with their spades out trying to fill the hole before they fall into it. At the other end, Dartford’s Darts have already hit bull and Sutton have secured a play off place, while only an unlikely set of results can stop Kingstonian doing the same. But, there are no fewer than five teams fighting for the two remaining places, six if the unlikely set of results occurs. Very unlikely.

So, what’s the deal? Well …

18. Maidstone United P40 – 45 (-19)
19. Ashford Town (Middlesex) P41 – 44 (-14)
20. Margate P41 – 42 (-23)
21. Bognor Regis Town P40 – 41 (-17)
22. Waltham Abbey P41 – 41 (-26)

Waltham Abbey are already down, despite last night’s stirring 4-1 victory over Bognor, which was a shot in the arm for Margate. On Thursday Bognor visit Maidstone and if the home side win then Margate’s destiny is in their own hands. If Bognor win then Maidstone can still go down. Win or lose on Thursday, the problem for Bognor, as well as being owed several hundred quid by Premier Lge money pit, Pompey, is that their final game is against the runaway Champions. The problem for Margate is that they are playing Hastings who, regardless of Thursday’s results at the other end of the table, are still very much in the hunt for a play-off place.

The other team who come into the equation are Ashford Town (Mx). They do have the good fortune to be up against a Harrow Borough team who are effectively on their mid table summer holidays and even if Bognor lose to Maidstone then they are really just an exhibition match point from virtual safety.

At the top the permutations are, frankly, baffling and Thursday’s fixtures might not even give clarity.

1. Dartford P40 – 87 (53)
2. Sutton United P41 – 72 (19)
3. Kingstonian P41 – 67 (4)
4. Boreham Wood P41 – 65 (9)
5. Aveley P40 – 64 (17)
6. Hastings United P41 – 63 (13)
7. Tonbridge Angels P40 – 62 (5)
8. Wealdstone P41 – 62 (2)
9. AFC Hornchurch P41 – 61 (5)

Borehamwood and Aveley are in pole position for the final two spots at the moment but two games on Thursday night could confirm or change that. Aveley are away at Horsham and the Angels away at Wealdstone, the latter game is pretty much make or break for both sides. If Aveley win and Tonbridge and Wealdstone share the spoils then Kingstonian and Aveley are in the pay offs. The final spot then becomes Borehamwood’s to lose and leaves Hastings, Tonbridge and Wealdstone hoping they slip up.

If Aveley draw at Horsham tomorrow night that probably doesn’t change things much but if they lose that will let the winners, if there is a winner, of Wealdstone v Tonbridge through the gate. In that event either one would be a point ahead of Aveley meaning that the final spot would be theirs to lose. If whichever team wins on Thursday night also wins on the final day then there will be nothing Aveley can do about it. If Tonbridge beat Wealdstone on the other hand, Wealdstone are almost out of it because they are 7 goals worse off than Borehamwood and at least 4 worse than Tonbridge, even if the Stones do win their final game.

So, permutations galore but the bottom line is that, on Thursday, there are two MASSIVE RPL games. Only Wealdstone can kiss goodbye to their play-off hopes with defeat and only Aveley can seal theirs with victory but if Aveley and Borehamwood win their remaining games then no one can catch them. Whatever the outcome, the final day of the Ryman Premier League is going to be a corker.

Based purely on our previous enjoyable encounters with clubs in the RPL, we’d like to wish Ashford and Margate good luck in avoiding the dreaded drop. We’d also like to wish Sutton good luck in the play offs and Hastings and Wealdstone good luck in getting into them, although in reality we realise it’s unlikely to be both! But, regardless, who ever gets there, they will have deserved it … just about! Who we’re going to be supporting if they all get there is a different matter. We’ll cross that bridge …

Picture, if you will, the photo on the front cover of Jeff Perkins’ ‘A Tale of Two Uniteds’. Jack Charlton. Less a footballer, more a post-war schoolboy confused by why his neighbour won’t give his ball back. Picture, again, if you will, this man below on the right. His name is Cashley and he’s a professional idiot.

This Saturday morning a collective male eyebrow was raised at the sight of the latest instalment of Cole’s world tour of faintly haggard bottle blondes. That Ashley chooses to shmoozes with this bevy of provincial hairdressers is perhaps indicative of his notorious lack of class. It is perhaps an example of the bullet-proof psyche modern footballers seem to have developed.

It would be pious to condemn Cole too much, we’re all fallible, he is simply one half of our example of the glorious contrasts in football. The life of a top footballer now is so at odds with Wor Jackie and, more pertinently today, the man pictured behind him, Sutton United’s Peter Drabwell.

Chelsea’s maverick sinistra is sorted, he has no worries, he is set for life, he can act with impunity in every sphere. Jack and Peter’s peers, on the other hand, were not so lucky. In their day a mistimed tackle or an unfortunate incident could so easily have seen serious injury, loss of career and loss of livelihood, even for well known professionals.

Football’s not the same, money runs football, it’s not a game anymore … yadda yadda yadda … Not more of this bleating about the state of the modern game? Well, no. We’ve just started reading the aforementioned book and it genuinely does bring a lump to your throat and shows the stark reality of how football has changed. The point being, we liked the sound of the book, it was FA Cup related and this weekend we had no cup football to view and our man at Sutton United was going to furnish us with a copy. So, we went to meet him and watch the U’s play Tooting & Mitcham.

Once in Mitcham we snuck into a local hovel to watch the sodom and gomorrah show on Sky Italia Tutti Bella dodgy live feed. Much to our amusement, Moyesyey was delivering a substitution masterclass to old Mr Injury Time and his bunch of ludicrants. Then we realised this meant Chelsea would win the league. Bollocks.

Leaving lager land we crossed the River Wandle with it’s picturesque riverbank houses and through the bankside trees appeared the impressive home of the Terrors. Imperial Fields is a cracking little stadium that T&M physio Denis Lawton told us was actually yet to be completed. Big plans are afoot here, another main stand is to go up facing the current one and the increasingly famous Bog End is to be expanded while the bog behind it is to be transformed into a 3G training pitch.

Our man from Sutton is Gerard Mills, or MIllsy as he first introduced himself to us via the conduit of the i.n.t.e.r.n.e.t. We tiptoed across the red carpet towards the centre circle where, with mic in hand, Millsy presented us with our golden, hand crafted copy of Jeff Perkins’ tome. We bowed, took our bounty with gratitude, held it aloft to the cheering crowd and retired to the edge of the impressive massed bank of away fans. This actually happened but is top secret, off-piste realfacup information so you probably won’t read about it elsewhere.

As this game kicked off Tooting & Mitcham and Sutton Utd were separated only by goal difference and the terrifying fractured line that separates the end of season play off lottery from another season in the same division.

With form, line ups and previous localish derbyish knowledge aquired from Millsy, we watched as Sutton tore into Tooting’s poor home form. The bulk of possession was yellow and bar one smartly saved counter attack, the early chances went the away side’s way.

Matt Hann was scythed down on the left, the ref played advantage and Gargan failed to connect 3 yards out. Should have been 1-0 Sutton but the hack also served to warm up the niggles. A few minutes later Quarm clipped a ball through the Terrors defence, Charlie Taylor ran on to it and Dave King tipped his shot round the post.

As the half hour approached and the hard but mostly fair challenges continued to fly, Tooting finally started getting in to the game. The wick turned up further when Tooting’s former Carshalton defender Colin ‘Mad Dog’ Hartburn and Sutton’s James Norwood started slapping each other. ‘Told you’ said Millsy, confirming his pre-match prediction that Hartburn would at least get booked and probably sent off.

A bit of even ebb and flow preceded the sucker punch the Sutton faithful had feared their lack of goals might bring when Simon Parker, a teacher by profession like Peter Drabwell, found himself in space on the right and slotted comfortably past Scriven.

Tooting & Mitcham 1 Sutton 0

Sutton had an instant chance to reply but Gargan again failed to convert Taylor’s lay off. Quarm got booked for a late tackle and it was half time. ’2-1′ said Millsy confidently as he sloped off to the boardroom and we ambled to the bar.

Nice bar. Limited booze. Certainly not the Hogs Back T.E.A advertised in the programme, were we in the right bar? MASSIVE Stellingvision on the wall. I fairly promptly tipped my generic lager on the floor. Twat. Got another. But at least Ipswich were winning. I wonder who will get the equaliser” quipped Ryan. The spillage made us late. The beer Hitlers wouldn’t let us out of the bar to watch the second half start so we watched from the door where we could see one penalty box. It was riveting. Four minutes of watching Scriven amble around his area. Blinding.

The second half was a corker. 58 mins – Ball over the top, looked like Hann was through, looked like Mad Dog caught him, second yellow, first red. Millsy spot on. Tooting down to ten.

The resultant free kick was played down the left, Norwood cut inside and took a tumble. It looked a blatant dive, the ref just waved play on. Paul Vines wasn’t happy and had a bit of a foot-stamping paddy in protest at the perceived dive. Nothing happened.

A man down and Tooting were getting worse. They were OK in the first half but ‘only by attrition’, Ryan pointed out. I actually thought they should glimpses of some nice play, they just look woefully shy of confidence. ‘The lino looks like a woman’ added Ryan, almost exactly as I was thinking exactly the same thing. It was the menopausal, short, grey hair gave it away.

It was fairly consistent pressure from Sutton now and I was looking for some arty photos and musing that Tooting were ‘actually defending quite well’ just as comedy defending presented Gargan with a half chance that he frapped into the corner.

Tooting & Mitcham 1 Sutton Utd 1

There was only going to be one winner. Mann haired down the right, burst into the box and was floored (above left). Stone wall, nailed on, definite penalty. Not according to hermaphralino. Not according to the whistler Eric Mackrell. Definitely something fishy about that decision. Sorry.

With time running out Gargan rapped the post with a chance easier than he’d scored but harder than he’d already missed. Millsy had a better view, he said it looked like it was going wide. A point gained for T&M, two points dropped for Sutton but the Gambians looked better equipped to make the play offs. Indeed, having written this while watching Manchester City .v. Liverpool bore the country to death, I have to wonder whether both of these non-league players are that much worse than their richer counterparts.

Cheers to Gerard for the book, we owe him a drink or two when we finally make it down to Gander Green Lane. We’ve only just got hold of Jeff Perkins book but from what we’ve read we recommend you get hold of one. We’d also like to thank Denis Lawton for his few words as we caught a cheeky tab by the dugout.

We’ve got our own ideas who should win but we want your suggestions too, we’ve been to lots of games but they are only a tiny fraction of games played.  So, leave comments here, email us at the address on the home page or Tweet us your opinion, we’ve already had a couple of suggestions …

Everton: Tweeter grandoldteam argued that the Toffees should win it “Because of our run last season (Liverpool, Villa, Man Utd en route…) only to fall at the last hurdle.” While we all would have fancied that being the actual result, it is still last season. Sorry, no.

Stoke City: Ilkeston Town fan @ilson_fan reasoned that the winners should be “Stoke. They beat York who beat Cambridge who beat the mighty Ilkeston so they must be REALLY good!”  That is compelling but we can’t have a Premier Lge team winning The Real FA Cup.

So what do we want you to bear in mind, who has been the nicest, most helpful club, who’s had the best team, scored the best goals, embodied the FA Cup spirit, had the best sense of humour, perhaps it was where you simply had the best day out, maybe it’s the team who has played the most games or got the furthest from where they started, or perhaps you think your local team should win?  Whichever of these is your reason, let us know and we’ll consider it.

Yes, we know that Forest Green are still in the Cup, we know there are some League 1 sides still in but they are going to have to go some to have the impact that some already have and, frankly, the mainstream coverage of the tournament is getting quite depressing. The Real has gone, hyperreal has arrived.  Obviously, we’re looking to our non-league followers to step up to the plate here but our short list is:

AFC Wimbledon | Aylesbury | Basildon Utd |Chelmsford City | Dartford | Lowestoft Town | Sutton Utd | Tooting & Mitcham | Wealdstone |

Who else should be on it – and why?